Child's Play

Okay, so a couple blogs back I mentioned that I wanted to embrace my inner child. Here’s what I’ve observed since then:

1. I watched a small gang of children beating up a pylon. Yes, folks, a pylon.

2. While not really watching it this season, I was slightly disappointed that the finale of Dancing with the Stars isn’t a showdown between Joey Lawrence and Mario Lopez. What could be a greater guilty pleasure than a Blossom vs. Saved by the Bell dance-off?

3. I was busy subtitling a mid-nineties non-cool TV show this morning when I got an e-mail from a coworker. For the sake of all involved, I have changed names. The conversation:

Bob: Hey Nadine, do you think Frank’s cute? He called me chicken, so I had to ask.

Me: This reminds me of the fourth grade. Maybe the third. He may have called you chicken, but he's the one who has a buddy doing his dirty work for him...

Bob: Ouch, I guess that's a no, huh?

I then went on to explain that to say no would be cruel, but to say yes would be to imply something. I therefore embraced my right to remain silent and started wondering where I should go for my cootie shot. Do boys ever grow up?

Thought to ponder (for the men out there): Don’t ask manipulative questions like, “Do you think I’m cute?” That puts us in an awkward position. Awkwardness does not evolve into passionate love. It evolves into me ignoring you. Be a man. Take a chance. Read Wild at Heart and then live dangerously. If you don’t have the guts to ask me out, I’m not interested in your little games. The end.